One-On-One Conversations Are a Prime Responsibility of a Leader

Our recent articles were about the importance of timely responses to everyone with whom we work.

This message certainly was appreciated by many as we received a good number of appreciative replies stating that this is a sign of respect and is our duty as a leader.

There is another and equally important responsibility we have as a leader – initiating regular check ins with our people, asking, e.g.,:

• How are you doing? 
• Do you have what you need?
• What are your challenges?
• How may I help?

Ideally, these check ins should be a one-on-one conversation, not an email. Stop by a person’s office or desk, or if a different location, pick up the phone.

Some leaders try to speak with each of their team members daily – and certainly weekly is a must. After all, our responsibility as a leader is to help our people learn, grow, and be successful. This is what the most effective and successful leaders do.

There are so many insightful questions we can ask our people, and we will gain a wealth of rich ideas, for example:

• How can we improve?
• What should be our priorities going forward?
• What are we missing that would help us be a more effective team?
• What advice do you have for me?

Aside from the helpful ideas we will gain, which should certainly help improve our productivity and relationships with our clients, there is another very fundamental reason for our regular conversations with our people. Leadership is not about our being great our self, it is about our helping others be great. 

In his wonderful, insightful quick read, The 100/0 Principle: The Secret of Great Relationships, the author, Al Ritter, offers that a leader must develop and maintain constructive relationships with each of her/his team members – and that the only way to do that is with one-on-one conversations. We must make the time to do that, and they need to be two-way conversations. We listen more than we speak. Not just hear, truly listen to learn and understand. 

It is an acknowledged principle of highly effective leaders that they check in individually with their team members at least weekly, ideally in person; if not, by phone.

Everyone wants to do a good job and be successful. Our mentoring, teaching, encouraging, and coaching should and can be a difference maker for our people – each and every one of them. We must not play favorites. If we do, we lose the respect of all our team members. Our priority must be that we treat everyone, each team member and as many other colleagues as we reasonably can, with respect and dignity, and that means having constructive, helpful conversations with each of them on a regular basis.

One of our favorite books is Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott, who offers Conversations are the work of a leader.

We hear too often “My manager takes me for granted.” That is because there are few true one-on-one conversations, asking questions like the samples listed above and also not expressing our genuine gratitude for them and their work. Simple words and gestures of appreciation go further than we realize.

Equally true, when we do not express gratitude to and for our people, and stay connected with them, their respect for us decreases, their motivation declines, and some will look for new opportunities elsewhere.

Everyone wants to feel appreciated and valued, that they are heard, and that their ideas matter. As a leader, it is our responsibility to assure that they do.