Musings About Emotional Intelligence

I recently wrote an article about emotional intelligence (EQ), the key indicator of our success in business, as a leader, and even in our happiness.

EQ is far more important than our IQ.

In essence, emotional intelligence involves our:

• Self-Awareness
• Self-Management
• Social Awareness
• Relationship Awareness

Susan Mahanor, SVP of Risk Management of ACE Group, a very savvy executive, read the article and dropped me a note about the ACE Women’s Forum she had just attended where they discussed EQ, specifically self-awareness. Sue suggested that I write further about how we can work to increase our abilities with this very important skill.

I have encouraged lots of people to read Emotional Intelligence 2.0.

It is an easy read with lots of insight. There is so much to be gained, certainly a better understanding of EQ, as well as suggested ways to improve selected skills.

Self-awareness is knowing our self as we really are—not just as we see our self, but also as others see us. That makes such a difference in our relationships with others and helps us create positive changes.

As the authors suggest, recognize the ripple effect of our emotions and the mood we put out to those in our presence. Our emotions and our moods are contagious. They have a long-term effect on the results of our team, good or bad.

As Sue wisely said, a leader of a team only gets an A if everyone on the team gets an A. That means a leader needs to be a positive influence, an energizer, as well as a teacher and coach, to help their team members learn, grow and succeed.  And to help team members bring out their gifts.

To really understand the ripple effect we create, we need an attitude of wanting to improve from our inside out and have the courage to ask others how they are affected by our emotions and the moods we create.

Ask them to be thoughtful and candid, express that we really want to know their opinions, and that we will not be defensive or angry.

Emotional Intelligence 2.0 offers worthwhile advice about awareness of our emotions – owning them so we may mange them, slowing down, recognizing our hot buttons (both people and situations), how our mood affects our thinking and even our presence, and lots of other helpful suggestions.

Our face-to-face communication is key to our relationships and our long-term success. Our EQ is the core of our effectiveness with others, so I hope this is helpful, and I will continue to write about this subject as well as more about the other EQ skills.