Common Sense Leadership: Listening Is A Most Important Skill

Common Sense Leadership is influencing and guiding others to do their best work.

Conversations and relationships are foundations of this highly effective leadership.

Happy and inspired teammates work hard and want to do well for themselves, for their team, and for their organization. In fact, they are more devoted and loyal to their organization and their boss, which means significantly higher productivity.

A key to successful conversations and relationships is intentional listening.

I always knew that being a good listener is important, yet until I enrolled in the Georgetown Leadership Coaching program, I didn’t understand exactly what being a good listener means and just how critically important it is to effective leadership and to our relationships in our business and personal lives.

Our faculty emphasized active listening as essential to our success.Active listening is having a clear mind, not judging the person, and not thinking about whether we agree or what we’re going to say when the speaker is finished. It requires that we quiet our mind, which is not easy.

Most of us listen with a problem-solving mind, “Oh, I know what she should do.” We are not really focused.  Well, maybe we’re focused on ourselves and not on the speaker.

Active listening is work. Work is an adequate description in that it is definitely a skill we need to practice to master. Truly, effective and successful listening is intentional. This means we want to listen effectively so that we understand the speaker, including what she is saying and maybe what she is not saying, as well as her feelings.

The very best conversations and relationships involve our intentional listening – listening to learn, with a clear and quiet mind, not waiting our turn to speak.

In the coaching world, it is often said that listening is our gift to someone! So true!

Intentional listening is a gift of respect to others, which will be appreciated and will improve our relationships. 

My invitation to you is to decide you will develop improved listening skills.  When I did, I entered conversations in business during the week and with family and friends on weekends with the intent of listening with a quiet mind, focused solely on the other person, not on my own thoughts. Afterwards, I would take a minute or so to observe how I did. Did I listen effectively? How did I feel? How did I feel I was received?

What effect did my listening have on the other person?I knew when I listened well, and I knew when I could have been better.

These self-observation practices definitely helped me improve the quality of my listening. Several clients have selected improved listening skills as a desired outcome of our coaching, and they seem very pleased as they feel relationships with those who report to them have improved and that they are more effective leaders as a result.

Intentional listening is Common Sense Leadership!