Boosting Our Inner-Confidence

Having the humility to accept and share that we want to always be trying to improve, and having the quiet inner-confidence to step up and out to share our ideas and to take on new and or important work will definitely help our contributions to our company and the people of our company.

Men’s generally high level of confidence can be an advantage, although at times, it can also be dangerous, e.g., snap decisions or taking risk without discerning how it may affect others if it does not work out.

Women’s generally lower level is limiting for them. Fortunately, there is more and more support to help women lean in, step up, and realize they have so very much to contribute and that they strengthen the organizational culture of our companies. By the way, women are more risk aware than men. Risk awareness is needed!

We need women in senior and mid-level management positions. Simply, companies and organizations should not be run by men only.

In my experience in business and now my leadership consulting and coaching work, I have seen this dynamic very clearly. I wish I had a confidence pill I could offer many of the women, and some men, with whom I work, as I know how much they have to offer their companies. I know that a confidence boost would make their leadership and contributions even greater and more visible, and that their advancement would definitely improve the results of their companies.

Marisa Peacock, founder of the Strategic Peacock, which helps organizations create and implement online strategies, offers that it is important to understand why women often have lower confidence. It is not inherent, it is learned behavior. Historically, when women are not given opportunities, when they see less qualified men in positions of power, when they are not taught to be loud or curious, etc. — they will most likely develop a confidence level that prevents them from speaking up, volunteering, etc.

It’s important to know that many women who have low confidence are not born that way, that it’s often because of the male-dominated environments in business and family that can cultivate that behavior.

We must absolutely realize that those with a lower confidence level have every bit as much potential as those who have high confidence.

When we are hesitant to do something or speak up, it is a huge help to recognize what we are feeling. For example, our we afraid of failing? While it is easy to say we all have failed, it does take much courage for some to take risk.

Failures are a door to go through to succeed.

Like with so many goals and aspirations, we can begin to move ahead with small actions and mindsets. We can definitely feel better about ourselves with these simple actions:

• being prepared
• calling people by their names
• taking a genuine interest in others
• smiling, comfortable eye contact
• asking good questions
• listening to understand and learn
• getting others to talk about themselves
• contributing ideas
• being well groomed
• dressing neatly
• always being 15 minutes early
• standing tall
• walking purposefully
• exercising
• eating well
• assuring that our spirituality is a priority
• adequate rest
• staying in touch with family and friends, including old friends
• contributing to our communities
• encouraging and helping others, and
• definitely being in a positive frame of mind and a source of positive, and only positive, energy. Thinking positively!
• thinking about our desired outcome and taking even a baby step

These may seem like the basics, and they are. Yet, often progress towards what we what to achieve flows from the basics, even what might be considered baby steps. Even baby steps change our mind set as we are positively moving forward.

How can leadership help? If we acknowledge that women generally and some men have a lower level of self-confidence, and accept the premise that a problem discussed is a problem half solved, leaders can certainly be part of the solution. We can get together for conversations, ask how can we help one another, and be supportive and encouraging.

It is amazing how “Hey, you are good at that, nice work.” is a boost to one’s confidence. The more we encourage and help one another, women and men, gain the self-confidence we deserve, the stronger our cultures and the better the financial results of our companies.

Cathy Becker, a former colleague, an HR professional, and a great friend said to me “Leadership is how we make others feel about themselves.” This is an insightful description.

Will these thoughts, actions and principles guarantee confidence to succeed in business? They will sure help – a lot!